Brilliance

I was probably a teenager when I began to realize just how intelligent my father was. Before that, he was just this amazing hugger, the man who held me above the ocean’s high waves, caught me in his arms when I jumped down the stairs in our house and loved me fiercely in so many ways that were seen each day. When I began to notice his intellect, I began to see just how high it was.

My dad could add columns of figures in his head. He had the ability and foresight (I would now even call it a prophetic gift) to look to the future and accurately “see” where different choices/paths would likely lead. People of all socio-economic, ethnic, religious and professional backgrounds came to my dad for his wise counsel and advice or for an authentic hug or honest deal on the furniture and floor coverings found in his family-owned business.

He was on numerous boards, councils, fund-raising groups, leadership teams, and pastoral search or deacon committees. He served as a leader or president of the Chamber of Commerce, the Lions Club, the Girls and Boys Homes of N.C., the State Merchant Association and more. 

In summary, my dad was brilliant, in the way a diamond is… there were so many facets to the man whose heart put God first, his family second and his work and community third. He considered a primary calling to be a steward of the resources he was given and gained through working six-days-a-week-for-40+-years of his life.

Growing up, it was an honor to be known in our community as Lionel Todd’s daughter. He was not perfect, but he was a man who lived a life of integrity and purpose to the degree that he took his multitudinous responsibilities more seriously than anyone else I knew.

Even today, after Todd Furniture Store is closed and Dad is not as actively involved in the community, I still hear stories of how my Dad helped that person, guided this project or gave of himself to this group or helped lead that effort. This was just the way my dad walked out his life led by his Lord.

Now, my father has Alzheimer’s and Vascular Dementia. The brain that could add up columns of numbers in his head often struggles to zip up his coat, put on his seatbelt, or remember details that give dimension to life. His thought processes are much simpler; his sentences aren’t often logical and his conversations are not frequently coherent. And there are more and more times when the diseases in his brain short-circuit his communication or suffocate his personality.

Therefore, is he still brilliant? Well, maybe not in the way he was. Yet, when I see him tell people he loves them or when a song or scripture moves him to tears or when he just reaches out and holds my hand while I’m driving or walking or just being with him during the days… then I realize he is manifesting a different kind of brilliance… that which is eternal and permeated by love… love from him and the love of God through and around him.

So now that I’m older and life with my dad is so much harder, how does it feel to be Lionel Todd’s daughter? Am I still proud to be the daughter of man who doesn’t always remember my name or where I live or what I do?

You. Better. Believe. It.

My Heavenly Father knew just who needed to be my earthly father. And nothing – not even the hellacious season that dementia dictates – will ever change the honor it is to be the daughter of my dad.